Nicki Minaj Opens Up About Past Toxic Relationships

Photo: (DeviantArt)

Dear all of you beautiful souls.

A man who loves you does not:

1. Humiliate you on social media
2. Beat you
3. Cheat on you
4. Call you out of your name/put you down to lower your self esteem due to his own insecurities.
5. Hide his phone, passwords, where abouts, etc.

I rlly used to think love had to hurt. So I could never look down on anyone else. We are merely human. It’s not easy to leave. Especially in the world of IG where all ppl want to do is post relationship goal pics for clout & attention. A man should make you feel safe, not afraid

I remember being so afraid to speak cuz I never knew when that person would be in a particular mood and I could maybe say one wrong thing that would get me hit. So the diff you see in me now is that feeling when a woman feels lifted up, safe, appreciated & unconditionally loved.

But I first had to learn how to love MYSELF. 🙏🏾 if you wouldn’t let a man treat your mother, your sister or best friend like that b/c you LOVE them, then you wouldn’t let a man treat YOU like that b/c you love YOU. This isn’t about judging. We judge too much. Lift them up. 🙏🏾

When u see a woman in a toxic relationship, rather than laugh & say mean things, try to offer sound advice from your heart & root for her to learn her worth. We’ve all been there. I saw my parents fight & argue non stop & never divorce, so I thought this was normal behavior…

I saw these series of tweets Nicki Minaj posted yesterday. Although I loved them all and I loved the message she sent, I also thought in the back of my mind what would make her talk about this after all these years. I wasn’t the only one who thought something was up when she tweeted about this because I saw a few replies under the tweets of people asking if she was okay. In the tweets, she mentioned being in toxic relationships in the past and learning how to love herself.

For some strange reason, I honestly believe she only talked about this to justify her relationship with her current significant other, Kenneth Petty. He was convicted of murder and is also a registered sex offender. After learning this, many people dragged her for being involved with this man.

Not only is this man a past convicted felon and registered sex offender due to attempted rape, more of their story of getting together just sounds outright messy. Nicki said, once, that she cheated on a past boyfriend for him and how Petty beat him up. And I saw on a video Chrissie uploaded on YouTube (featured below) that he himself admitted to cheating on his partner for Nicki AND told his partner that he’s only with Nicki to get up on a bag. The story just sounds like a HOT MESS!

Although I personally don’t care who she’s involved with romantically, I think people have a right to feel some type of way for any woman to be involved with a man who has such a past and probably deserves the dragging. I feel like even more so, she has fans that love her and want what’s best for her. I don’t think some of her fans like seeing her being involved with this man.

I believe Nicki Minaj is fully aware of what people have been saying online about her being involved with this man. At first, she was going off on people criticizing her relationship on her podcast, Queen Radio. Now, I feel like she released these series of tweets looking for sympathy or trying to shift the narrative so people can think, “Oh, she’s happy. She’s with a man who loves her” instead of thinking, “She’s with a murderer and a rapist!”

Don’t think for one second that these celebrities aren’t reading people’s comments and social media posts. Just because they don’t respond to every single one or say nothing at all doesn’t mean they don’t read them. This is proof that celebrities DO read people’s comments AND care about what people say about them.

I believe Cardi B did this exact same thing this past week when XXL released an article talking about how fans believe Travis Scott’s album, Astroworld, should have won the Grammy for best album over Cardi B’s album, Invasion of Privacy.

She, too, put out a series of tweets talking about how hard she worked on the album even while sick and pregnant to defend herself and say she deserved the win.

On my album I showed different sides of me.From my intro talking about my pass. To living my best life inspiring people.Relationship songs while I was going thru my own relationship drama to shaking ass like Bodak & that ASS .Every song went platinum!

I did it all while I was pregnant.Throwing up, drowsy,terrible colds and in a rush to finish it so I can start doing music videos before I started showing .I spend 24 hours for months sleeping on a couch with my pregnant depressed ass in a studio .

I wasn’t even thinking of winning or even the Grammies. All I can think about was …everybody is disappointed in me,am I still going to have a career after this baby ? Is this album going to make me or break me ? I need to finish before I start showing .

All while I just separated from my long time manager.I had to get my husband to talk to my label cause I never had a relationship with them so we all came together to relocate me to Atlanta and Miami to finish my album before my stomach start showing.

When i kept seeing the certifications of the songs going gold or platinum I was so excited cause my husband was out here asking everybody for a feature on my behalf so the ones that said yes thank you from the bottom of my heart cause TRUST ME ALOT OF ARTIST SAID NO!

So when I won a Grammy for it I didn’t have no words to say but when I went home I started reminiscing on what I went thru during that period I was like YEA BITCH YOU DESERVE THIS SHIT !abd until this day my shit still charting .

Just like with Nicki’s tweets, I wondered why Cardi was tweeting this stuff as well. I believe she did this to shift the narrative from people saying, “She doesn’t deserve it!” or “Other albums were better!” to “She’s worked so hard. Maybe she actually does deserve her Grammy”.

I honestly feel like other albums were more deserving of the Grammy myself, but we need to learn that Grammys don’t always go to the people that deserve it most or worked the hardest. The Grammy committee gives the Grammy to who THEY feel like they want to give the Grammy to. It’s not about who WE or an other artist feels deserve it.

There are lots of amazing albums that weren’t even nominated that I’m SURE was way better than Cardi B’s. And I listened to her album. I liked some songs on there, but I wouldn’t say it deserved a Grammy.

These awards shows always have and always will be SHAMS! Many people have called this out in the past, but some of y’all called them bitter and jealous “because they didn’t win one”. Now y’all are starting to see it. It’s funny how it takes for someone y’all don’t like to win a Grammy before y’all admit to yourselves how fake and phony they are. But I digress.

Again, all of this tweeting that Cardi and Nicki are doing is just them looking for sympathy and/or shifting the narrative of the comments directed towards them. And I feel that people should NOT fall it. It’s all a game!

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Female Rap Is Taking Over!

Everyone is talking about Jermaine Dupri’s comments about today’s popular female rappers, saying they are “strippers rapping” and they rap about the same things all the time. Although I agree, I feel like him saying this is one sided and I feel like men saying and agreeing with this without checking male rappers are only threatened by the influx of upcoming female rappers.

Having this view about female rappers is one sided because the male rappers are no different. How many popular male rappers are there that aren’t rapping about drugs, sex, bitches, and hoes in every song? I’ve seen so many women ask this question in response to this statement about female rappers and the men name literally the same handful of male rappers: Kendrick Lamar, J. Cole, and Drake. Like every man who responded literally named these same few every single time. None of them named anyone different. If you can’t name more than three to five popular (keyword here) male rap artists that don’t rap about degenerate nonsense, what does that tell you?

Men are only attacking female rappers because it’s on the rise now. More people are starting to listen to and check for female rappers. The female rappers are doing better on the charts and selling more than a lot of male rappers right now.

Female rap is on the rise and it’s taking over and men are starting to feel threatened. That’s the truth!

Cardi B responded to these statements and I couldn’t agree more. Here’s her response:

For All White People Have Done

I think about the stories I’ve heard black people telling for years of how white people negatively stereotype them.

I think about the stories of how white people lock their doors when they see a black person walking by or how they clutch at their purses.

We see on the news how they stay killing unarmed black men because they “feared for their lives”.

We see on television how they usually portray us as violent and ignorant.

I take all of this into consideration and think, HOW DARE THEY GET TO TREAT US THAT WAY????

After all they’ve done to us for centuries, if anything, WE should be treating THEM like that!

They came over here and stole and stripped away every single solitary thing we had. They take credit for and profit off our inventions and culture. Yet, have the nerve and audacity to portray us as thieves on their teLIEvision.

They have invaded and killed millions of people in countries across this whole world throughout history to get everything they have. Yet, have the nerve and audacity to portray us as the “most violent race” on their teLIEvision.

They came over here telling us we were inferior to them and everything about us–our skin tones, features and hair–was ugly. Yet, when we call them out for the things they do, they have the nerve and audacity to call us “divisive”. They have infiltrated numerous races of people that wasn’t them and made them hate themselves and feel inferior to them. No one on this planet is more divisive than white people.

And when we call them out for what they do or complain about how they treat us, they have the nerve and audacity to tell us to “Go back to Africa” like they didn’t come over here invading from Europe.

The truth is white people are ashamed to be white. They are ashamed of their history and what they are caught doing to many people across the world, especially to black people. They try to push who they are on the people they oppress to keep their image clean and keep the rest of the world from seeing who they are and treating them accordingly.

For all white people have done to us, we should be treating THEM how they treat US. We should be negatively judging THEM and killing THEM because we feel threatened…

BUT WE DON’T!

We do nothing but continue to beg them to stop killing us, include us in things, and treat us like human beings, and they STILL continue to disrespect us.

That should tell us everything about US and everything we need to know about THEM.

And you know what else? I think they know that this is true. That’s why they are always doing things to us. They fear we can snap at any moment and it will be justified. That’s why they’re always “fearing for their lives”.

Discrimination Against Black Hair Types & Lengths

(Philosophy di Lorenzo Serafini – Backstage – Milan Fashion Week/Matteo Valle/Getty Images)

This was brought to my attention by a fellow reader. I’ve noticed this myself in the natural hair community. When the natural hair community first began to gain popularity on YouTube, I was happy because I thought real black hair was finally getting accepted…until I noticed this.

A lot of black women who first start going natural wear weaves at first because they refer to their short natural hair as the “ugly phase”. They will wear weaves until their hair grows to a certain length (Some women say that they do this to get their hair to grow longer easier, but I explained in this post why I believe that is an outright lie and excuse). A lot of people only like natural black hair when it’s a certain length. I feel like some people took the black women with long natural hair the wrong way (probably purposely) in the natural hair community online.

There aren’t as many popular natural hair YouTube channels where the women have short hair. I don’t think people compliment women with short natural hair as much as they compliment women with long natural hair. When I first cut my hair and went natural and it was really short, I didn’t get many compliments for it. I didn’t start getting a lot of compliments until after I grew some length to it.

The women with long natural hair on YouTube was supposed to show that black women’s hair can grow long and how to get it to grow long. For a long time, there was a myth going around the black community that only mixed or nonblack women’s hair could grow long. It wasn’t to send the message that only long natural hair is beautiful.

I noticed the natural hair length discrimination, but what I didn’t notice, which was brought to my attention by this fellow reader I mentioned at the beginning of this post, was texturism. Only a certain type of texture of natural hair is more acceptable in the black community than other textures. To make things more clear, looser textured natural hair or the texture mixed women have when they wear afros are sometimes more acceptable than women who have kinkier textured hair.

I searched natural hair on YouTube and women with looser textured hair popped up first, their videos took up most of the page and, for the most part, had more views than women with kinkier textured hair. The same thing happened when I searched it on Google.

(Photo: Flickr)

We have to learn to accept our hair AT ALL lengths and textures! Cut out the discrimination and “picky-choosiness” between hair textures and lengths! We have to learn how to accept our all of real hair textures and lengths just like we accept straight or loosely curly hair in every length and texture.

Like I believe I’ve said in a different post about natural hair and what you might see me saying a lot more in the future, we won’t accept our hair as our own unless we accept it at all textures and lengths. We will always come up with some excuse to cover it up and be insecure about it if we don’t. We shouldn’t be ashamed and insecure about our own real hair that grows out of our scalps!

The Problem With Talking About Self Hate To Black People

Check out my new video from my YouTube channel where I discuss the problem with talking about self hate to black people. Be sure to like, comment, subscribe, and share if you like it. Thank you.

Are People Creeped Out By Women With Curves Or Big Legs?

I think about all the woman teachers who made news headlines a few years ago because people were wondering if their clothes were too revealing to be in a school environment. Patrice Brown, a.k.a. “Teacher Bae”, is one of many great examples of this. She went viral a few years ago because people made her attire controversial. To a person that hadn’t seen a photo of her, by the way people were reacting, they would think the teacher was wearing a ridiculously short skirt or a shirt that showed too much cleavage. Not at all! She was fully dressed. Her dress reached to her knees. Nothing was showing except her legs.

I remember seeing a picture of Fantasia on Facebook years ago where she was wearing a leotard and many people in the comments were screaming at her to “put some pants on”. By the way the leotard was made, the whole thing couldn’t be seen, so it looked like she was just wearing a top with no pants. I think about how women like Rihanna, Beyoncé, and Ariana Grande dress. They wear short things that show their legs all the time and I’ve never heard anyone tell them to “put pants on” under their pictures (unless they barely have anything on at all). Did people react to Fantasia that way because she has bigger legs?

(This isn’t the exact photo of her I’m talking about, but she was wearing something like this.)

I remember one time I wore some shorts and my dad told me I should “wear pants instead” because they were “too revealing”. I’m in my twenties, so he didn’t say it because of my age or because because I’m “too young”, I should say. And my shorts were no different than any other shorts that people wear. They weren’t too short or too tight. I kept wearing the shorts anyway because I knew there was no problem with them. I think he only said that because I have big legs. I noticed no one ever tells thin women that they can’t wear shorts or skirts that show their legs because it’ll be “too revealing”. I’ve only heard it said to women with bigger legs.

I’ve seen many other posts and photos on social media of people taking women of any profession who were curvy and FULLY CLOTHED asking if what they’re wearing is “appropriate”. What I gathered from all of this is that many people just might be creeped out or intimidated by women with curves or women who have big legs and they project it on to these women to make it look like the women are the problem, but in reality, THESE PEOPLE COMPLAINING are the problem.

My theory on why people are intimidated is that men are because they are actually attracted to these curvy women or women who have big legs, but they probably feel like they can’t or shouldn’t act on it, so they project and try to tell these women to change what they’re wearing.

The women are probably intimidated, most likely, due to jealousy. The women saying these women are “dressed inappropriately” are jealous because they wished they looked like that, but because they don’t, they project and make it seem like the woman is the problem.

This also sounds like sexism. It sounds like people are looking for an excuse to police what women wear. How come there are no viral stories on the internet asking if what a man wore to work was appropriate?

It’s a shame that our society is like this. Leave curvy women alone! The problem is not them or what they’re wearing. It’s THESE PEOPLE wanting something to say!

Which Matters More In Music: Lyrics or Beats?

I’ve heard this debate go on in music, particularly hip-hop, for years. I see so many people online and hear so many people in public debating about whether lyrics matter more in a song or if beats matter more. Some people say that lyrics don’t matter at all and the beat and hook to a song is the most important of all.

I believe that choosing one over the other is both wrong. I believe both lyrics AND beats are equally important. Songs would’ve have words if lyrics didn’t matter. Songs wouldn’t have beats if beats didn’t matter. In a lot of songs, there’s a lot of work that gets put into the lyrics. There’s a lot of work that gets put into beats as well. Both take talent and skill to make, so to say either one doesn’t matter, to me, sounds like downplaying the work these people put in to make a song what it is. And it’s only being downplayed due to ignorance. Many people who listen to music have never wrote a song or produced a beat a day in their lives, so they don’t understand the work that goes into it.

I think the people that say lyrics don’t matter in a song more than likely are incapable of listening to lyrics. They just don’t know how to listen to lyrics or they don’t understand them, so they ignore them and go straight to the beat and hook.

I also think saying lyrics don’t matter in a song is a lie probably created by the music industry. A lot of songs send horrible messages. A lot of songs promote things like murder, rape, disrespect, and drugs. The music industry doesn’t want to stop promoting these negative messages, so they try to fool people into not worrying about lyrics.

If we say lyrics don’t matter, then these types of lyrics will go over everyone’s heads and they’ll be listening to these types of songs and promoting these messages without batting an eyelash.

Just like you have to know the type of food you’re putting in your body to stay healthy, you have to know what music you’re listening to in order to keep your mind healthy. It might sound crazy, but it’s true. (You have to do the same with television, too. You have to know what types of shows you’re watching on television and what messages they are sending. It’s not just a TV show. It’s not just a movie. It’s not just a cartoon, but this is a topic for a totally different post.)