I had to share this exceptionally trurhful post by black|burgundy. I couldn’t have said this better myself!
One growing trend I’m seeing on the Internet more & more is black men and black women blaming each other for the problems in the black community. There are countless social media posts and videos where black men and black women are spewing hate about each other, blaming each other for everything wrong with our race, and getting tons of reactions and views for it.
Black men and black women are blaming each other for the self hate in our communities. Black men say black women are the cause because they’re always wearing straight hair and shame their daughters’ “nappy” hair while doing it and are very quick to straighten it. Black women say black men are the cause because they shame and refuse to date women who don’t straighten their hair and are more attracted to them when they wear weave than their real hair.
Black women say black men shame dark skinned women and refuse to date them. Black men say that black women shamed them for their dark skin and have horrible attitudes towards them, which is why they refuse to date them. And say that black mothers shame their sons by comparing them to their fathers in a very disrespectful manner.
They’re blaming each other for why we don’t have businesses in our communities. Black women say that black men aren’t building and give all of their money to white women. Black men say that black women give all their money to Asians by buying fake hair and nails.
They’re blaming each other for the high single mother rate in the black community. Black men say black women are single mothers because they like thugs and choose poorly in men to have children with. Black women say that it’s because black men are afraid and running away from their responsibilities.
They’re blaming each other for the high crime rate. Black women say it’s because black men are violent and don’t know how to act. Black men say it’s because of black single mothers and how they’re poorly raising young black boys.
There are so many other examples. The sad part about this is that not only are we as black people treating each other as the enemy for our problems and not our true enemies and oppressors, nobody is taking responsibility for these problems. There’s nothing but a bunch of finger pointing. So, what’s going to happen? NOTHING! The problems are going to continue to persist and we will continue blaming each other. It’s not going to do anything but get worst.
Also, we have to be very careful about how we talk about each other publicly. Saying these things about each other and ourselves will leave us wide open to stereotyping. And when it comes time to fight for real justice, our oppressors can use all these things we say about each other against us to deny us the justice we need. For instance, if we get angry about a white person calling a black person a “nigger”, they can use the fact that we call each other and ourselves that against us to get out of trouble. Or if we’re being unfairly treated or abused somewhere and we speak out about it, they will bring up “black on black crime”.
We need to come together, work together to find the root of these problems and fix them ourselves because if we don’t fix them, no one else will.
The fact that we do all this finger pointing is proof that BOTH black men AND black women are doing things to contribute to the problems in the black community. The things that we’re saying that the other side is doing says it all. And one side is NOT more guilty than the other. BOTH sides are EQUALLY guilty.
I really think we do so much negative talking about each other because we hate ourselves and fear our oppressors. I also think we do this because we are frustrated with our problems, but are too afraid to do what we have to do to face and fix them. We take this hate and fear out on each other. We have to stop and start healing.
When we said “Black Lives Matter” because we thought black people were being treated unfairly by law enforcement, what happened? People cried, protested, called us racists and “divisive”, and responded with other movements playing off of it. People came up with All Lives Matter, Blue Lives Matter, and even White Lives Matter.
Somehow so many people found it so offensive because we said Black Lives Matter. But people made all these adverse movements against ours and no one is protesting theirs. What is this telling us?
Even the silly ones, like “Little Booties Matter”, should raise some concern and not be treated as funny. There’s a reason they’re allowing so many people to say that their things matter, but when we said that we matter, everyone freaks out. Something isn’t right.
Why does us saying Black Lives Matter make so many people so uncomfortable? So uncomfortable to where they feel the need replace to word “black” with anything and it’s okay?
There’s many theories about why more black people don’t support black owned businesses. You would think that more black people would shop where their people own the stores and create the products/services, but unfortunately, many do not. Why is this?
I have two main reasons for why I believe this is. The first reason is price. I know how important it is for black people to support their own businesses, so I went searching for some black owned businesses online to shop one day. I have to admit many of the prices at black owned businesses are ridiculous, I’m sorry to say. When other people point out how high the pricing is at a lot of black owned businesses, people love using stereotypical deflecting and shaming tactics, like “You people complain about these prices, but love buying iPhones and Jordans” or “Black people need to stop being so cheap!”, instead of acknowledging and admitting that the prices are a problem and we need to get together and find a solution for it.
If we don’t admit that the prices are a problem, nothing is going to get done about it. The first step in solving a problem is acknowledging and admitting that there is one.
I know the businesses in this society are built on a supply and demand basis, so I know a lot of black business prices are high not because they want them to be, but because the demand for their products and services aren’t as high as it is at other places, being that it is a smaller business. So, since the demand is lower, the prices are higher. The only way we can fix this is if more of us start supporting them, but I know it’s hard for many people to shop at a store where the prices are out of reach to them.
People want to complain about how black people would rather shop at the Walmarts and Targets of the world than black owned businesses, but what they always conveniently fail to tell you is that at Walmart and Target, you can pretty much get anything you want at a good price there. Unfortunately, we can’t do that with many black businesses. People go where they can stretch their dollars and get the most things for their budget. And that isn’t just a black thing. ALL races of people do that.
The next reason I have is location or availability. In many neighborhoods across America, black businesses are few and far in between. Many people have to go a little (or a lot) out of their way to get to a black business. Sadly enough, other races of people have more businesses in our neighborhoods than we do. So, people go to the businesses that are closest to them, where they don’t have to walk or drive too far out of their way. And again, that isn’t just a black thing. All kinds of people shop at places that are near them.
In my opinion, a lot of black businesses are unfortunately inconvenient to many black people. In order for more black people to support other black businesses, I think we have to have our businesses give the convenience (if not MORE convenience) that other businesses give.
I don’t believe black people shop at every other store because they don’t want to support their own people, like I’ve heard some people say. I believe they shop at every other store because every other store is more convenient for them.
Many of us love repeating that statistic about how long a dollar circulates and changes hands in other communities compared to ours, but we always tiptoe around why that is.
I think on this subject we do way too much dancing around the pink elephant in the room. And that pink elephant is that we are VERY FAR behind other races when it comes to business. One of the things that surely proves that we’re behind other races is that other races of people don’t have to pull shaming tactics to get people to shop at their stores. We don’t hear the owners of Walmart and Target saying, “If you can buy XY and Z, you can shop at our stores”. But we feel the need to say it.
The only way we’re going to catch up is if more of us start realizing how important it is that we need businesses and need to create and control our own resources.
There’s no reason for every other race of people to have more businesses in our neighborhoods than we do, especially since it’s not like that in their neighborhoods. We don’t own a bunch of businesses in their neighborhoods. They own their own. It’s been way past due for us to do the same.
There’s a video I stumbled across by a YouTuber named Chrissie, who has a video speaking about why black people don’t shop at black owned businesses, which I have included in this post, and she said pretty much the same thing I’m saying now, but one interesting thing she said that I didn’t think about is that a lot of times, we resent products and services that are made specifically for us.
We hate when other races of people don’t include us in their ads or whatever, but when it’s something created just for us, we hate that it doesn’t include others. We think it’s racist. We’re so stuck on inclusivity, including everybody else into whatever we have, that a lot of us are not ready to accept a business that caters strictly to us.
That’s one thing we have to get out of as well. I don’t think we fully understand that people are supposed to cater to their own people. When they make a product or service, they’re usually not making it to cater to other people, even though they don’t discriminate against who can buy the product. That’s what we need to start realizing. We need to start realizing that nobody is supposed to build and cater to us BUT US!
People may not like everything that Tommy Sotomayor says, but this video can NOT be debated or denied. Everything he said is true. Black people, we have to be better than this! This type of stuff is the reason why Rachel Dolezal was able to pull the stunt she pulled with black people. It’s time to wake up, black people, PLEASE!
Many people are offended whenever someone says this. I’ve watched several videos and read several articles that spoke about this and the amount of people being upset about it always appalled me. It is true. Mixed people are not black.
I remember people in my family proudly talking about the “one-drop rule” like it was a good thing, like it’s something to be proud of; “anybody that’s mixed with the smallest percentage of black is completely black”. I didn’t think anything of it when I was younger. But now that I’m older and I hear people saying, “One drop makes you whole”, it just sounds ridiculous. One drop of nothing in the world makes anything whole. Why does it have to be when it comes to black people?
If we think about history and read just a few history books, we all will see that mixed people were never considered full black until racist white people created the one-drop rule during slavery. They were always referred to as something else before then; coloreds, mulattoes, etc. (And now that I think about it, they actually still are. Even though we call them black, we still call them mixed). If they are black, we wouldn’t feel the need to call them something else.
Racist white people came up with the rule because they wanted to keep their race pure and hide that they were sleeping with and raping slave women. Also, of course, because they didn’t want to claim anything that has black in it as belonging to them. We were “beneath” them, according to them.
When we continue accepting this rule, we are accepting racism, white supremacy, and an old slave rule. It’s not slavery days anymore. It’s time to stop holding on to these old slave rules that were basically forced on us.
I always hear black people getting upset whenever a mixed person chooses to identify as mixed instead of black (like Tiger Woods, for example) and say, “It doesn’t matter what you identify as! When the white man catches you in the streets, you’re black!” And people think this is something good when they say this. So, whatever a racist white man says goes? We have to accept them as black because they say so? Of course, they will say you’re black. They’re the ones who came up with the rule! But it doesn’t make it true. Racist white people have imposed many rules on black people that were actually lies and things used to keep us from advancing all throughout history and this one-drop rule is one of them. Besides, if anyone says this, it means that they know the person is right by not identifying as just black, but they think because white people say otherwise, it “doesn’t matter”.
I believe that the reason black people hold onto this rule is because they can use mixed people to get what they want out of a society that gives nothing to black people. Then, once black people can no longer use them for their benefit, that’s when they accept that mixed people are not black.
For example, if we claim mixed people as black, we get the most dominant golf player in the league (Tiger Woods). If we claim mixed people as black, we get one of the most powerful and dominant singers in America (Beyoncé). If we claim mixed people as black, we get one of the most dominant and successful wrestlers in WWE history and a very successful actor (Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson). If we claim mixed people as black, we have the first black president of the United States (Barack Obama). And so on and so forth.
When black people feel like these mixed people are taking things away from them, like privileges and platforms (movie roles, awards, magazine covers, simple praises, etc.) that actual black people should have, that’s when they will start noticing that these people are mixed instead of black. But the thing is, these people have always been mixed. You can’t wait until they start taking things from you to notice it.
I also believe black people accept mixed people as black because they live through mixed people. Black people know that mixed people are placed on a pedestal in their communities and get praised for everything. Black people want that for themselves. So, they accept mixed people as black to feel like they have all that, too. A lot of black people, sadly, don’t want to be black and are very quick to claim that they’re mixed, especially if they are mixed, but it doesn’t look obvious. Whether we admit it, know it, or not, a lot of black people have very little pride in being who they are. The actions of many black people and the things we say about each other prove it. And that comes from many years of oppression and colonialism.
Mixed people accept being called black and identify as black because society tells them to and if they don’t, they get shamed and it shouldn’t be like that. I also believe they identify as black because they are full aware of the privileges they get from being mixed amongst black people and they don’t want to give that up.
I have absolutely nothing against mixed people. I just don’t think they are black and should identify as black. They are not black historically and they are not black in reality. I think they should identify as what they actually are. Biracial or multiracial.
The “Racial Draft” started as a comedy sketch on Chappelle’s Show by Dave Chappelle. It was about trading people of different races to other races and identifying as those races instead. Now, today, black people use it to jokingly “trade” other black people that they consider traitors to their race or simply just doesn’t like for other races of people they believe would benefit the race better.
Although it’s supposed to be a fun joke, I think we should stop telling it. How many other races of people are telling this joke, saying they would trade their people for our people? I think a lot of times we say things without realizing what we actually are saying.
I’m sure other races of people have people within their race that they hate, but we will never hear them talk about trading them for any other race, especially us, joke or not. Nobody wants to claim our racial identity. They may steal our culture, but they will never identify as us. Even if we are claiming to “trade” the people who we claim to be sellouts, why trade them with someone of a different race? Why can’t we trade them with other, more productive black people?
I feel like the “racial draft” is our way of trying to get other races of people to accept us because deep down, we feel like other races of people don’t accept us. And we want other races of people to accept us so badly that we are willing to give up our own people for them. I think we have to be much better than this. We are notorious for letting outsiders identify as us. Having other races of people identify as us will leave us wide open for infiltration.
We consider jokes like these harmless and funny, but they pretty much aren’t. They are really conditioning us to accept anybody as black. It’s time for us to stop this. Let’s stop giving other races passes to be us when they never do the same for us!